Santro & I

I drive an Alto. And for all reasons, obvious & implied, I love my car. Its my first car, I had bought it on my own and recently paid off its loan. Its safe, convenient & dependable. And because its a Maruti, there is never any trouble finding service for it.

So why is this post called what its called? Well, Santro & I go way back. Longer than I first recalled when I thought about writing this post. About 10 years ago, when my father was planning to buy our first family car, I remember I begged & pleaded with him to buy a Santro. My knowledge of cars was strictly limited to their looks at the time. And I loved the way it looked.

But the fuel efficiency, sturdiness, and reliability of the Tatas prevailed over this unknown foreign brand "Hyundai".. and we got a rather ugly looking Indica instead. Well in all fairness, it has been a reliable car that has served us very well for almost 10 years now. But still, there was something about Santro that Indica didn't quite have. It couldn't zip zap zoom...

A good few years later, more constraints led to my buying an Alto. A car I fell in love with after buying it. Nevertheless my elusive affair with the Santro remained. My best friend owned a Santro. And since he was the one who taught me how to drive, I learned my driving mostly on a Santro. I loved the small driving conveniences it offered. The only thing he refused to teach me was to zip zap zoom...

Life went on... I was driven to my surprise birthday party in a Santro; was driven around the streets of Meerut trying to find the venue of a friend's wedding in a Santro, lost our way & took 100s of U-turns on the way to another party again in a Santro..the list goes on...

My driving skills improved overtime, and as I graduated from one level of driving to the next, I kept sighing wistfully at the Santros zip-zap-zooming past me on the roads. By now, confident of my driving skills, another friend also often let me drive his Santro, and I loved every bit of it. Its pickup, quick steering response, high ground clearance...yes it didn't make me feel as safe & grounded for some reason, as my Alto did... but as long as I got to drive it, I was willing to live with my fears :)

And then things started changing...I started getting annoyed at people with drivers rage..rash drivers who would overtake from the wrong side, who were nearly always speeding,

"Bloody idiots!!" I would mutter, and keep driving.

Until I started noticing something very strange...nearly all of those rash car drivers, were driving a Santro.

And yes, they were "zip zap zooming..."

Till date, the maximum no. of rash car drivers I have come across on Delhi streets are Santro drivers. And though that doesn't do anything to take away my fascination for that car, I guess it does say something about how easily people find ways to misuse power of any kind; in this case, Santro's quick steering response :P

Everything said n done, I still think Santro is an absolute pleasure to drive car,; my friends still drive it and my brother just bought his second Santro with my full support (err..I mean almost full after all my desperate attempts to get him to upgrade failed miserably)

Sure, Santro has its drawbacks, apparently its light weight body makes it unsteady at high speeds: well up until 120 Km/hr its fine and I dont know how much higher it can go anyhow..and how often you would need to / be able to go higher than that anyways!

& though I still haven't seen a color that perfectly compliments its design..all the colors it comes in are either too bland & boring; or just don't go with its design; I would still buy it any day over the other cars in its segment

Till date I have been driven around in a Santro far more than all other car journeys combined; given that almost everyone around me seems to belong to the Santro fanatic community; [ I would start a Santro community on Facebook if there weren't so many inane ones already!] except may be my own driving around in my alto;

And every journey with Santro is a memorable pleasure; and that is of course owing more to the people I am with; but at least a third of the best moments, including some of the very best, I have had in the past 5 years or so have happened inside a Santro..."Santro & I resonate at a certain level" a psychic might say ;) :P

So thats the unfinished story of Santro & I...the first car I loved in my waking conscience; the car that gave me my first driving lessons; the car that has given me unforgettable memories of wonderful time spent with friends & family....the car that I have never owned.

a vanilla 27

I recently turned 27. Now, 27 is a rather uneventful, dry age to turn.

It doesn't have the excitement of turning into a teenager @13, doesn't makes your heart flutter with the hope of first love @ 16, you wont be suddenly legally entitled to drink the way you became at 12:01 am, @ 21 , no quarter life crisis of 25...doesn't even mark your transition from one landmark decade of 20s or 30s to the next....27 doesn't do anything. It doesn't give any specific reason to rejoice, or to be anymore miserable at getting old, than any other non-landmark birthday.

Its plain and simple, a vanilla 27, somewhere in between.

Nor was the celebration a historic event in my life. I spent a nice & quiet birthday with a few friends I met in between driving ( :O ) , and a nice dinner with few family members & cousins;

Like I said, it was a pretty uneventful affair, for a pretty uneventful age

So why have I picked this to be the year of announcing my age to the world, when I prudently didn't for all those other more happening transitions ??

The fact that I never in my dreams ever imagined turning 27 [ I For some reason I always imagined my life only until 25!] and its making me feel old beyond imagination..might have something to do with it...I think I am still in denial, that 27 years have actually passed by!!!

But I think its more due to this lazy sunday afternoon. It reminds of my school summer vacations, when all of us cousins would go to stay at our nani' house.

My nani used to have a big old fashioned bunglow in Delhi; just 2 big rooms, 1 huge kitchen, 1 big balcony and a garden outside the house. In one big room without a cooler, sometime with power cuts too, with only handheld fans to keep the flies n mosquitoes away we would all sleep next to each other on mattresses on the floor. Talking softly n giggling so those asleep would not wake up; Many names of our younger cousins were debated upon n decided amongst us in those subdued conversations; and much to the consternation of those younger ones, those names have stuck :)

I have a distinct memory of watching the sunlight flood through the iron mesh of the wooden frame door; the dust particles dancing in that light, splitting it into multiple rays..I used to wonder if they did it deliberately, and if they were trying to create a rainbow

I remember hanging by the huge main entrance gates, which was just the right height for us to grab its rails and swing; sometimes 3 of us on each gate as we waited for our moms n aunts to come from work to see us; running and clinging to pretty much anyone who came; the ensuing tantrums all of us threw at their attempts of taking us back home; and the victory smiles after our moms gave way to 1 more day of holidays;

I remember plucking ripe cotton & tomatoes from the garden with my nani, & climbing on the guava n mango trees; I remember the aam ka achaar she used to give us with food; and sometimes when there wasn't enough sabzi to go around; how she would make all of us laugh about it, and then cut whatever veg was available, add salt and give it as a special course of meal

I even remember the silly pranks I played as a child, and I never forget the "friendly" punch my cousin gave me on my frontal teeth because I told her that they were hurting too much.. [well of course they broke and left me with the permanently impaired dental state I have now]...a perfect example of how too much love n protection can be bad for health ;) :P

There are a lot of such memories that flood back on afternoons such as these as I stare out of my top floor sea-facing bedroom with a perfect view and I can't help reflect.

Simple. Idyllic joys of childhood.

Its been exactly 14 years since I spent my last summer in that house. 14 years ago that house was sold off. I remember the last time we had all gone to take a look at the house.....almost all of us were crying, trying not to let anyone else see. An imposing & rather hideous structure has replaced that house now. The house where my mom, all of her siblings, and all of their children grew up. I still picture it vividly and sometimes even have dreams of playing around in it.

Life has come a very very long way since then. multiple jobs, a handful of degrees, living in different countries, 100s of people have come n gone, a few great ones have stuck around...and though I can never recreate magic of the times gone by; life isn't bad at all. We cousins still stay connected thanks to the new age of telecom & internet; and we still love meeting each other whenever possible. All our hearts still lie with our nani; whenever we can, we go & visit her in her now much smaller house; that brims with the same amount of endless love & happiness.

so yes, at 27, as I graduate from B school, knowing that life will probably change dramatically once more, I get ready to shift gears once more..waiting for the next round of this roller coaster to begin.

And as I hope that I will continue to learn, grow & improve as a person; continue to strive to add value to people's lives around me; and that I will succeed in giving more meaning to my life & be blessed with the fortune of living out my dreams; I will save these lazy afternoons to reflect.

These lazy sunday afternoons that remind me of the magical times gone by.

Some childhood fascinations, one never grows out of. and some, one just refuses to. I guess candyfloss and balloons probably lie in the second category for me. I dont think I ever want to stop getting excited

i arrived at the IGI Airport in Delhi at 2 PM. The flight was dot on schedule. And this

just a promise...

i am an optimist. most of the times.

mostly i am the person who loves children,
flowers, birds & butterflies
the person who sees the beauty
in the smile of a first time parent
or the happiness of a student getting a good grade
the person who loves watching rain falling on the glass screen..

mostly, i am the person who loves to talk to her mom
every night about small things
& catch up on family gossip
over a session of head massage
the person who loves to tease her kid sister
laughing & fighting over silly stuff

mostly, i am a simple person.
who prefers to trust people
& trust their commitment, dedication, sincerity
you may call me too trusting, too naive,
& i think you are right
but i prefer to keep it that way,
it makes life easier.

yet, the more i see of this world,
the harder it becomes to remain simple.
because the more i see of the world,
the less i like it.
& the more disdainful i become.

everyone caught up in petty matters of ego,
ego that is in desperate need for attention,
immersed in conceit & greed,
lacking dedication n commitment,
ego that resorts to lies to preserve itself,

everyone engulfed in their own petty matters
of their own insignificance existence

don't get me wrong, i am not holier-than-thou.
i have my faults, more than i care to count.
& yes i do know some phenomenal people
& am blessed with precious gems as friends
my life is full of people who love me,
and full of opportunities & possibilities

yet, the more I see of the world,
the more I realise I don't fit in
& the more i see that i don't fit in,
the lesser i even want to.

& i wonder at times,
if the world will succeed in transforming me
into one of its own, filled with conceit & deceit
& ensure that I fit in & that I succeed

or will it succeed in turning me away
away from itself and all its promises
as a defeated mortal, resigned to my fate
with lost dreams of a lost future

or will I keep fighting this battle,
this battle to preserve me as me,
to find a converging point of give and take
of trust and mistrust, of love and hate

this battle to find a converging point
between my definition of success
& that of the world's

this battle with this world
this battle with me.

can i win this battle
or am i just a promise,
waiting to be broken.