happy valentine's day ;)

last night, while i was waiting for some droll work realted files to download and generally hating my life, i started browsing through the net, something, the net content made me realise, i havent done in a realllllly long time. neways, owing probably to the valentine's day fever, i kept running into v-day ads and banners of gift vouchers, and cards and ballons and oh-so-many-red roses, so just out of my insatiable curiosity, i clicked on one of the ads,

"This v-day ! Love, be-loved and appreciated....."

and the homepage completed the sentence

".....tips to kiss, love..." and many more such how-tos. now i am not against romance, but somethings are too amusing to be anything else actually ;) in search of such similar amusement, i read on...

so, the first page i landed on had the following content,
(its hilarious and i really cant stop laughing, )

Get your partner to the sea shore at sunset. Give her smile. Buzz a latest romantic song. Hold her tight and give a moist kiss.
==> dont forget to carry a good stereo system, her favorite song cd , a lip gel, reach half hour before sunset, prepare the ground, and by the time you are done, ofcourse you do realise you could've just stayed at her place, the sun does set around her roof as well

You are with your girl friend moving in the car. Stopped at a traffic light. Hold her hand and give a soft kiss.
==> and in case the signal suddenly turns green, im sure she'll not mind getting her hand crushed while you shift gears

Take a stop watch. Ask the girl to help you maintain a long kiss, longer than a minute and so on.
==> statuatory warning : lack of breath or sudden stopwatch alarms going off can cause injury so keep your mediclaim ready before doing this one & do this near a hospital :P

Make a sign of first letter of your partner’s name with your lips and slowly gently fix a kiss on her cheek.
==> hmm. now I know why Xena must have never gotten kissed

Order a pizza. With the help of tomatto ketchup make a sign of kiss on pizza. Ask her to make same sign with her lips at your cheek.
==> come again??

When you are travelling with her in a car. Tell her whenever we see a dog or any other specific animal, on road side, we will kiss each other. A good excuse.
==> so no one actually looks at the traffic while driving? and i think i cant drive!

Tell your love that something is there below her eyes. Ask her to close the eyes. Use the opportunity and give her a kiss.
==> ofcourse if during this time whatever is there actually bites her below the eye, then you could end up with a blue eye

Move in the rain without umbrella. Grab rain drops on your lips and then slowly place them on lips of your love.
==> i cant stop imagining a guy standing in the rain, cold and wet, trying to figure out why did the girl leave him, after all he was only grabbing his own lips repeatedly, trying to catch hold of a rain drop!!

when i stop laughing at imagining these mental images, i'll read on... maybe find-your-true-love-tips next time ;)

till then have a nice v-day. and avoid all kissing disasters if you can ;)