But jokes apart, even as an onlooker, I have never ever understood the madness behind this whole wedding ceremony. Its like the moment 2 people decide to get married [rather usually their parents decide], 50 others...at least...get an electric shock. they are woken up from their sudden zombie state of minds... Suddenly a 1000 different task lists are made and tasks for the next 3 months are divided meticulously amongst different people...the joys of having huge families planning your wedding...

It takes endless phonecalls to sort out the color of the bride's mother's sister's saree for the function 2 days before the wedding, dont get me started on the bride's outfit..i wonder if Jennifer Anniston ever paid that much attention to her costumes! and 1 phonecall from the pundit saying the muhurat will have to be delayed by 5 minutes brings the whole world crashing down!sigh...

What's amazing is that this timeframe of 3 months doesnt make that much of a difference, I have seen weddings of similar scale being arranged in a month's time and yes, having a year to plan doesnt help either, it just adds more tasks to the list ??!!

And the meticulous planning and task allocation...it would put any corporate to shame if only it weren't for coversations such as...

"Oye the tent guy hasn't called"

"O nahi ji I had asked Mamaji to call him"

"O mamaji has gone to the caterer. He asked me to ask you"

"But I'm taking didiji to the Parlour to get ready"
" Your didiji can go to the parlour herself. You call the tent-waalah"

..well you get the idea..

And then, there are the expenses. Parents save up all their lives to marry their children off. Specially daughters, but thats more thanks to the incorrigible dowry tradition in this country. [ It may be illegal for you to see on TV, its as real as the sun! It just takes different shapes, sometimes its a car, fridge, LCD TV, sometimes its gold, soemtimes its cash, usually its all these ]

If only I could get a penny for every time I have heard statements like,

.." They too spent 3 lacs just on the tent in their son's wedding reception"

"Aur Sharmaji gave his daughter a Corolla in her wedding"..

"and Khanna Sa'ab, spent 10 lacs over and above the wedding function"

!!!!!!!

Only 3 out of 10 of these people can actually afford to spend this kind of money on one function. The rest take all kinds loans at exorbitant interest rates, just to keep up to the "status" !! I have known people spending anywhere between 15-18 Lacs INR on just the wedding function. Even those who have never earned this much even in 2-3 years!! It is the ultimate "Keeping up with the Jones's" cartoon in the world! Not only are these weddings senselessly exorbitant effectively leaving the parents & some close relatives of the bride almost bankrupt

It is just such a big event, at times I feel its bigger for parents than the bride n groom!;they are a platform for everyone to show off all their riches, owned or borrowed; they are also a platform for you to prove your mettle of remembering names of, patiently smiling of the 500 people you have never seen in your entire life and will never see again.

No wonder so many people spend their lives in unhappy, beyond-repair marriages rather than getting divorced! Fancy throwing away a marriage that follows from that kind of a wedding.

Maybe , as people have been telling me since I was 12, once I am getting married myself...I will get it. I doubt....